I stumbled across Overheard in New York this afternoon. I may need to get involved...I can't even begin to explain the number of tremendously amusing things I hear throughout the day.A few favorites: You'll Never Go Hungry in New York, Sweetie
Mother, after listening to child talking nonstop: You are so bizarre.
Six-year-old boy,(seriously): I eat bugs.
--Central Park
Overheard by: Good to Know
On the Plus Side, I Get Tons Of Days Off for All Sorts Of Random Holidays
Overly enthusiastic customer: So I heard that they are coming out with a 32 gb iPhone for Christmas. Like a red product thing for Christmas. Is that true?
Overly perky Apple employee: Well, sir, I wouldn't know because I'm Jewish and whenever they have Christmas meetings, they kick me out of the room.
--Apple Store SoHo, Prince & Greene St
Overheard by: are they allowed to say that?
Girl #1: We can't cross now! There are cars coming!
Girl #2, beginning to walk into street: Well, they can't hit all of us.
--Lexington & 3rd
Overheard by: Following the leader
Lipstick Rings Around the Toilet Bowl Are Never a Good Sign
Young daughter to mother flushing toilet: Mommy! It says "do not flush."
Mother: No, honey, it says "do not flush feminine products."
Young daughter: What are "feminine products"?
Mother (after pause): Lipstick.
--Macy's Bathroom, W 34th St
Overheard by: Brin
Mice Have Always Been Fashion-Forward
Gay guy #1: Do you know that mice can survive longer without water than a camel?
Gay guy #2: That's gorgeous. I love it.
--East Village
I Promise to Answer on the First Ring
Guido, shouting: Yo, who leaves a fuckin' business card in the shitter? Seriously!?
Man from across bathroom: You should call the number on the card, maybe they'll give you a blowjob.
--Grand Central Terminal
Overheard by: Michael
On the Plus Side, You Don't Have to Fight Any Wars in His Name
Beggar to two girls: Jesus loves you.
Girl #1: No, he doesn't.
Beggar: Yes, he does! Jesus loves everyone!
Girl #2: Yeah, okay.
Beggar: But he does, he loves you!
Girl #1: No, really, he doesn't. She's Jewish.
Beggar: Shit, I'm sorrrry.
--8th & Broadway
Overheard by: Madelyn
There Go the Horseback Riding Lessons, I Guess.
Mom #1: She refuses to wear slacks! She'll only wear dresses and skirts. She told me, "mommy, girls don't like to have anything between their legs except their underpants."
Mom #2: Let's hope she feels that way til she's twenty.
--1 Train
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Street corner punk #1: Where did she say she lives?
Street corner punk #2: Yonkers.
Street corner punk #1: Yonkers? There's no place called "Yonkers"! She was playin' you, man.
Street corner punk #2: Whatchoo talkin' about, man? Yonkers is a city!
Street corner punk #2: Yeah right. There's also a city called "my balls."
--Sutphin Blvd & 89th Ave, Jamaica
Overheard by: Big Larry
And I really need to stop here. It's a black hole.
Image: mobane(dot) com.