Snow, UPS, etc.

For the past week, I've been noticing those little UPS "We missed you!" stickers stuck on the buzzer, outside my building. Having been anticipating a collection of packages from my Granny, I carefully inspected the notices each time they appeared. The first one was blank. The second one simply said, "Null." On top of that- another resident in the building had been taking them. I left the thought on my radar, but disregarded.

Yesterday, a third notice came. This one had an archaic version of my apartment number scribbled on it. It also had "Final Attempt" checked. Okay, UPS. Let's be fair here. Had you properly marked the first two ambiguous notices, we wouldn't be in this situation.

I logged on to UPS dot com and tracked my rogue package. I discovered that it was in a warehouse within an outskirt neighborhood, in Brooklyn. I requested a delivery for this morning.

-The next morning-

I logged on. Things were not looking good for my request. I called the 800 number. Negotiated. Remained firm. No, me trolling for my package in East Jesus Nowhere is not an option. You barely gave me a fighting chance, UPS. Yes, please call the message center and reach out to the driver.


1:00pm arrived. I needed to leave my post to sign onboarding papers. I stepped out onto my stoop. Snow! I briefly let go of the UPS debacle to snap three perspectives of my developing Winter Wonderland...then spotted the tell tale brown truck: halfway down the block.

You're mine, UPS man.

I hopped down the stairs, pushed through the gate, dodged an elderly woman and plunged into the street. I spotted him climbing into the driver's seat. I ran around the corner to the open door. I waved and began to inquire about my package.

"Ah yea. Your building is difficult. Here."

I signed and examined the box. Amazon. Toni Morrison's new book.

Although I haven't successfully taken down the roach that I spotted three times last night, I feel pretty good about acquiring the UPS package and making it official with the recent job offer. Two out of three, folks. Life is good.